When it comes to fast food and having that that “I just want to sleep for 3 days” feeling, nothing is more synonymous than the Big Mac from McDonald’s. It has its own song that actually lists the ingredients in a catchy and snappy way and is something that I have always enjoyed from time to time.

So I found myself thinking to myself the other day, I need to have something special in my mouth. So I went for the ol’ classic.

Walking into this particular McDonald’s is always fun because the employees have been trained to get your order as quickly as possible whether you’re ready or not. So as I walked in, I was promptly met with a “Can I take your order?” even before the door closed behind me. It took me sometime to realize that I was the focus of this question, but since I knew why I was there I quickly ordered a #1.

This is the all American meal, sad to say. Big burgers, salty fries, coke that doesn’t take like coke from anywhere else. This is what McDonald’s is all about. Taking a look at the image of the Big Mac and what you actually get is always quite humorous to me. The image is finely crafted tri bun creation with seemingly small samples of lettuce and onions. There’s supposed to be one slice of cheese, some pickles, and special sauce. Special sauce has always been interesting me, considering I don’t really like mayo all that much nor thousand island dressing for that matter, it still still amazes me that the two can be combined for something I call tasty.

What you see here, is one sloppy ordeal. Loaded with artificially grown lettuce, a jumbo jet filled with sauce, and did I mention that with the Big Mac I could never tell the difference between the onions and the lettuce? Anyway, I couldn’t even figure out how to grapple this beast. Heading to work after wards, I was stuck with the fact that I didn’t want to have that homeless/McDonald’s smell on me all day.

Little did I know that this sandwich was a two faced creation. One side actually sorta looked like the photos, while the other side looked as if three blind lunch ladies from Western Tibet had assembled it. So I grabbed the sandwich, took a bite of that wondrous beast. Great taste, great ambiance, everything was going smoothly, until I decided to set the sandwich down. Immediately it fell apart.

This is what I was left with. Needless to say I struggled the rest of the way but I still finished. There’s something about the Big Mac that keeps me coming back, whether its the fact that I know I shouldn’t be eating it or that it actually tastes good, I always end up finding myself buying another one. I say this because every time I eat one, I feel like a wounded duck for approximately five hours. My stomach tightens, my brain pulsates, colors begin to change, whatever it is, things just don’t feel right. This is what we call the fast food feeling. You literally feel like you have brain damage and nothing does it better than the Big Mac.

So in regards to the classic, I give the Big Mac a 3.5/5. It always tastes good but because of the fact that I physically feel it killing me, I can’t rate it too much higher.

3.5/5

Until the next sauce,

Andrew